Has Steven Soderbergh lost his damn mind? A Channing Tatum movie about a male stripper who wants to make furniture? Magic Mike, from the outside, seems like a totally ridiculous concept, but the more you think about it, the smarter it is. Women are going to flock to the ]]>

Has Steven Soderbergh lost his damn mind? A Channing Tatum movie about a male stripper who wants to make furniture? Magic Mike, from the outside, seems like a totally ridiculous concept, but the more you think about it, the smarter it is. Women are going to flock to the cinema to watch C-Tatez flex his abs, and guys? Well, guys probably won’t go anywhere near it. Which is fine, as they all went to see Soderbergh’s last flick, Haywire, with female MMA fighter Gina Carano. At the end of the day, it all balances out.

A Lower East Side NYC card shop is going above and beyond to prove it’s the best one in town…by having its owner give a pole dance to anyone who spends over $50 in the shop. And yes, the owner is hot.

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A Lower East Side NYC card shop is going above and beyond to prove it’s the best one in town…by having its owner give a pole dance to anyone who spends over $50 in the shop. And yes, the owner is hot.

The acrobatic owner of a lower East Side greeting card store is putting a new spin on customer appreciation – by pole-dancing for her patrons.

At her store of the same name on Allen St., shapely shopkeeper JillAnne strips down to “bootie shorts” and heels for anyone who spends $50.

“If they want to tip me, they can,” said the California-born artist, who also keeps a pole in her one-bedroom apartment. “Just don’t touch.”

JillAnne admits she’s no born athlete, although she did gymnastics as a child.

“You don’t want me on your football, baseball or basketball team,” she said. “But pole dancing? You want me on your team.”

Greeting card store owner JillAnne shows her customer appreciation with in-store pole dances [NY Daily News]

25,000 delegates for the G20 Summit will arrive in Toronto next weekend. Usually a flood of people into your downtown area is good for the economy. Hotel rooms are filled and restaurant reservations are taken weeks in advance. Unfortunately though, a multitude of Toronto businesses will ]]>

25,000 delegates for the G20 Summit will arrive in Toronto next weekend. Usually a flood of people into your downtown area is good for the economy. Hotel rooms are filled and restaurant reservations are taken weeks in advance. Unfortunately though, a multitude of Toronto businesses will suffer greatly during the summit. More specifically, the sex worker business.

“There are too many cops and the girls are watched like hawks if they go to a hotel room,” said the owner of Toronto Escort, who didn’t want his name used. “The girls feel uncomfortable with all the police.”

“Most people are moving their business to the suburbs for the weekend,” said the man, who claims his company is Toronto’s largest escort firm with 50 girls who conduct out-calls. “Out in the suburbs it’s business as usual.”

Let’s back up for a moment here and dissect the anonymous Escort owner’s quote.

“The girls feel uncomfortable with all the police”.

So let’s get this straight. The girls aren’t weirded out by “Johns” who perform donkey punches, golden showers, hot carls and an array of deviant sexual behavior I can’t even begin to describe but they’re weirded out by Canadian mounties? Yea, the hat’s a little odd and can be a bit porn star-esque, however I think that can be ignored.

Last I checked, prostitution is legal in Canada. Unless you’re operating some kind of brothel or decide to give BJs openly in the street, you’re in the clear.

Makes me really wonder what kind of seedy stuff is going on behind close doors. Might have to take a trip across the border and do some investigative work.

G20 running sex workers out of town {cnews}

A stripper who somehow possesses the ability to write (a Christmas miracle!) put together an article on The Frisky about stripping around holiday time. Her points are entertaining and occasionally absurd, such as this Quote of the Day.

‘Tis the season! That’s right—Christmas. We all endure ]]>

A stripper who somehow possesses the ability to write (a Christmas miracle!) put together an article on The Frisky about stripping around holiday time. Her points are entertaining and occasionally absurd, such as this Quote of the Day.

‘Tis the season! That’s right—Christmas. We all endure the holidays with that familiar combination of dread and enjoyment. So much to look forward to! There are the office parties, the family get-togethers, the decorations, and the gift exchanges. Everyone has their own unique holiday traditions. My favorite tradition is to spend the holidays in the buff. In fact, the holidays just aren’t the same if I’m not naked. Why? Because I’m a stripper, and naked is what I do best.

It feels tacky to gloat in this economy, but this holiday season is lining up to be my most lucrative. I’ve amassed several regular customers—I cheerfully refer to them as my “fan club”—and each one of them is going to give me a nice little gift. Or—fingers crossed—a big, pricey gift. I’ll get each special guy something thoughtful, too.

Stripping provides an opportunity for me to spread some holiday cheer the way I know best: with my big knockers. I admit my methods are unorthodox, but they sure are effective. I like to surprise a worthy customer with a free private dance, or pony up for a round of drinks for a particularly generous table. When a customer complains that he’s “just not feeling” the spirit, well, a quick smother of my cleavage relieves him of his grinchiness.

[Read the full article at The Frisky]

A gentleman found himself on the receiving end of a sexy dance at an Italian strip club. Unfortunately, he must have gotten too excited because he ended up dying when the girl removed her clothes. Or passing out, whatever. Either way, awk-warrrrrd (NSFWish video after the jump).

That is ]]>

A gentleman found himself on the receiving end of a sexy dance at an Italian strip club. Unfortunately, he must have gotten too excited because he ended up dying when the girl removed her clothes. Or passing out, whatever. Either way, awk-warrrrrd (NSFWish video after the jump).

That is pretty embarrassing, but I think we can all relate at least a little to this guy. Who hasn’t seen a woman naked and hyperventilated? Or maybe when you’re about to satisfy her with your tongue, you start to throw up a little and cry for your mom? I think we’ve all been there! Am I right fellas? No?

Sometimes when I’m with an attractive girl in public I’ll say something like, “Oh no, I think someone drugged my drink” then fake a fall to the ground. Sure nine out of ten times they’ll just walk out, but that one time…I bet they’ll instinctually just hop on top and hump away. Unfortunately I’ve only tried it five times and haven’t had it happen yet. But that’s what the law of averages is for, folks…optimism.

Perhaps the best headline in the history of headlines? Yes. Some stripper raped a dude. Shocker, he didn’t like it.

An Australian stripper hired for a bachelor party has been found not guilty of rape by a court in Melbourne. Linda Maree Naggs who works under ]]>

Perhaps the best headline in the history of headlines? Yes. Some stripper raped a dude. Shocker, he didn’t like it.

An Australian stripper hired for a bachelor party has been found not guilty of rape by a court in Melbourne. Linda Maree Naggs who works under the name “Tiffany” came to the party came armed with a whip, vibrator and “strap-on penis shaped” sex toy.

The best man gave evidence at the trial of being pressured by his peers into sitting on the seat where Naggs performed her routine.

Ms Naggs, the second stripper of the evening, was charged with rape after a scene in which the best man got naked on all fours and she applied lube then moved the strap-on against his “bottom area”. Witnesses described how at one point the best man “sort of screamed” and winced.

During the trial, the alleged victim told the County Court he urged Ms Naggs not to put the sex toy into his anus and was shocked when she did.

“I was pretty upset at that stage,” he said.

“I could feel something was there.”

Never has forcible sodomy been so underplayed as in these two quotes.

What a terrible strip club though. Strip clubs suck for the most part because I’m not getting off and, if I am, I have to go backstage and pay way more money or get a new pair of pants. Plus weak mixed drinks. But then you throw in me getting raped and it’s just like, enough already. This is why I stopped going to family reunions, you know?

[via]

Some dude met a classy gal at a strip club and then, shockingly, she proved to be less than reputable and ended up robbing him blind. Dishonest women in a strip club? Will wonders ever cease?

Police say a 50-year-old man should not have become close to a woman he ]]>

Some dude met a classy gal at a strip club and then, shockingly, she proved to be less than reputable and ended up robbing him blind. Dishonest women in a strip club? Will wonders ever cease?

Police say a 50-year-old man should not have become close to a woman he met in a strip club in Chicago Heights, Ill., given she allegedly stole from him.

Police said the unidentified man from Park Forest, Ill., originally met Rachel Klootwyk, 38, in a strip club and soon learned of her alleged health and financial problems, the SouthtownStar reported Thursday.

After the man started helping out his strip club friend by paying some of her bills, Klootwyk allegedly learned his bank account information and began using his funds as her own.

Park Forest Police Chief Tom Fleming told the SouthtownStar the man alerted police after learning of $3,700 worth of unauthorized account withdrawals.

“These are tough economic times for everyone, including bad guys,” Fleming said regarding the felony financial identity theft charge against Klootwyk.

“Sometimes, you get what you expect. Generally, you meet better people at church than you do at a strip club.”

[via]

Via Basic Instructions comes this comic about the multitude of ways you can turn an enemy into one of your closest pals.

I don’t think I could ever be friends with someone who was like WAYYYY into strip clubs. Don’t get me wrong, ]]>

Via Basic Instructions comes this comic about the multitude of ways you can turn an enemy into one of your closest pals.

I don’t think I could ever be friends with someone who was like WAYYYY into strip clubs. Don’t get me wrong, once in a while, they’re perfectly acceptable for seeing breasts while paying entirely too much for a rum and coke and simultaneously funding several drug habits masquerading as a need of money for college. But the guys whose response to, “Hey, where she would we go” always ends in an establishment with nude women dancing about shouldn’t be trusted. It’s not that I think there’s something wrong with someone who completely views women as objects, because I certainly don’t, but rather because there are much more affordable ways of seeing women in various stages of undress. Have you never worked in a hospital? One day as a volunteer there and you’ll have unfettered access to all sorts of barely conscious women. You haven’t lived until you’ve lovingly slipped the gown off of someone in a coma. It’s about as sexy as molesting a vegetable could be, other than putting lipstick on a cucumber and shoving it in the nearest unclean orifice.

Strip clubs aren’t what I’d call the most honest places on Earth since they’re basically built around women who have no interest in you pretending you’re not a piece of crap for money and turning you on just enough to make not ejaculating to be a nuisance. Fortunately, one brave ]]>

Strip clubs aren’t what I’d call the most honest places on Earth since they’re basically built around women who have no interest in you pretending you’re not a piece of crap for money and turning you on just enough to make not ejaculating to be a nuisance. Fortunately, one brave club is honest about what it offers.

But why stop there? I’m a marketer at heart and would love for Deja Vu to use some of my catchy, but truthful slogans. Here’s a couple more I whipped up to adequately convey the strip club experience.

[original image via]

In my usual daily searches for handsome men stripping, I came across this video. This is how not to give a sexy pole dance for your whore girlfriend who has a stripper pole in your bedroom.

This is why you leave the stripping to the professionals. Sure, you might ]]>

In my usual daily searches for handsome men stripping, I came across this video. This is how not to give a sexy pole dance for your whore girlfriend who has a stripper pole in your bedroom.

This is why you leave the stripping to the professionals. Sure, you might be athletic or even sexy. But there’s years of daddy hating, self-loathing, and awkward blowjobs being given to Persian men with their club shirts unbuttoned while you smell their swampy balls and old spice cologne that really make the strippers able to do what they do. It’s a mental game. Hunger for money and hating to look at yourself in the mirror are basically the equivalent of being tall and jumping high in the NBA.

You would think that being a stripper is all happy and respectful as showing your breasts and vagina usually is but you’d be wrong. Take, for example, this LA-area stripper who got set on fire yesterday.

An exotic dancer was set on fire outside the nightclub ]]>

You would think that being a stripper is all happy and respectful as showing your breasts and vagina usually is but you’d be wrong. Take, for example, this LA-area stripper who got set on fire yesterday.

An exotic dancer was set on fire outside the nightclub where she worked early Thursday, burning more than 60 percent of her body, police said. They were searching for two suspects.

A woman and a man called the 27-year-old dancer outside around 1 a.m. and then doused her with a flammable liquid next to the Babes & Beer sports club in the San Fernando Valley, police said.

Police identified the suspects as Rianne Celine Theriault-Odom, 27, and Nathaniel Marquis Petrillo, 22, both frequent patrons of the club. They were being sought for investigation of attempted murder, police said.

I would have to guess that this wasn’t quite what the club owners had envisioned when saying that their “strippers are the hottest”. And if it was what they intended, well, then that just doesn’t seem like the best work environment to be in. It’s like whoa whoa whoa I came here because I want to show my tits and cooch to strangers (and occasionally offer a handjob in the back room) for money, not to be disrespected.

I really can’t support this type of awful treatment of our nude Americans though. In this difficult economy, getting to see breasts for a dollar is a great deal and one that we shouldn’t risk subverting. Assholes. Learn to respect women. I mean, so long as they’re willing to take their clothes off for you. Otherwise, meh.

[source]

Stripper pole exercising is hot amongst the sloppy mom set because they get to be sexy! And dance! And get in shape! But it goes wrong when you realize that some of these women aren’t athletic and, well, that’s when the magic happens.

I guess the instructor was kind ]]>

Stripper pole exercising is hot amongst the sloppy mom set because they get to be sexy! And dance! And get in shape! But it goes wrong when you realize that some of these women aren’t athletic and, well, that’s when the magic happens.

I guess the instructor was kind of being a bitch by laughing at the woman. It’s bad enough that she’s way hotter than the woman, but then you throw in the fact she’s laughing as the woman almost paralyzes herself and I can see why an old lady would be annoyed. But there’s no defense for attacking a woman who’s good at stripping. They are Naked Americans and have rights to. They’re completely undeserving of your shoves and barbs and completely deserving of your dollar bills and pressing your erection against them in the hopes that they’ll offer you a BJ in a private room for reasonable rates. It’s a recession after all.

I just stumbled across this and found it to be utterly captivating. Meet world champion (I’m not sure what body recognized her, but I’m going to assume it’s the Whore Society of Athletics) pole dancer Kelly Kayne. This is what a superstar pole dancer looks like.

She makes it ]]>

I just stumbled across this and found it to be utterly captivating. Meet world champion (I’m not sure what body recognized her, but I’m going to assume it’s the Whore Society of Athletics) pole dancer Kelly Kayne. This is what a superstar pole dancer looks like.

She makes it look so effortless. Like all you need to do to be able to do athletic whorishness like this is strap on a lower back tattoo, tighten up the area around your crotch to get an effective camel toe, and BAM…pole dancing excellence. But it’s a lot more work than that, girls. You also need to have to be willing to make the little sacrifices. Like being willing to give handjobs to big tippers. Or understanding that you need to tell people you’re a “dancer” or you “work in marketing” instead of your actual chosen possession. And you also need to prepare for the awkwardness of your parents asking how work’s going on Thanksgiving and not wanting to tell them about how Jimmy the club regular stuck his pinky in your ass while he slipped you a single the other night.

Other than that, it’s as easy as it looks.

A collection of strippers from NYC strip club Scores are suing the establishment for taking 10 cents off of every dollar the whores received from patrons using the club’s fake money. Whose side am I on? The fake money, probably.

Almost 70 Scores top strippers want ]]>

A collection of strippers from NYC strip club Scores are suing the establishment for taking 10 cents off of every dollar the whores received from patrons using the club’s fake money. Whose side am I on? The fake money, probably.

Almost 70 Scores top strippers want their bosses to hand over the 10 cents they skimmed from every dollar slipped into their G-strings.

Following a hearing Monday in Manhattan Federal Court, lawyer Justin Swartz said dozens of former Scores employees – most of them dancers – have joined a class-action suit former Scores bartender Siri Diaz filed in October 2007.

The women accuse Scores of a “greedy money grab” engineered through the use of “Diamond Dollars,” play money customers use to tip their favorite lap dancer.

The strippers say management skimmed 10% off their “Diamond Dollars” take. Swartz said the two sides are “discussing the possibility of a settlement.”

There’s so many shocking pieces in this story. Scummy strip club owners? Women who show their labia for money (I know, they don’t do that in NYC, but come on, the idea of showing your labia for money is much funnier than just breasts) somehow wanting even more money? I’m taken aback by all of the unconventional ideas in this story.

It’s not in my nature to go against the rights of our brave nude Americans and their rights to earn the money they’re due for doing such brave things as: Showing their breasts to strangers, pretending to be interested in those strangers, wearing clear high heels, dancing to Motley Crue, giving handjobs to unattractive traveling salesmen for slightly more money, calculus, shooting ping pong balls out of their vaginas, and much much more. We must support their naked bodies unwaveringly, ideally by propping up said bodies against our erect penises for which we wear sweatpants in order to maximize the amount of contact they give us during their lap dances. Yessir, being a stripper is a glamorous life indeed.

[source]

When I think of a reputable place filled with classy people, I think of an unlicensed strip club in a dark alleyway of Manhattan. So you can imagine my shock when the owner of such an establishment was charged with prostitution.

A lawyer ]]>

When I think of a reputable place filled with classy people, I think of an unlicensed strip club in a dark alleyway of Manhattan. So you can imagine my shock when the owner of such an establishment was charged with prostitution.

A lawyer who operated a New York City lap dance club has been indicted on charges of promoting prostitution and laundering money.

Prosecutors say 52-year-old Louis Posner ran the unlicensed Hot Lap Dance Club in Manhattan and made more than $726,000 there from January through June.

They say he split prostitution fees with some of the club’s dancers, who charged $20 and up for lap dances and up to $5,000 for sex.

Prosecutors say Posner was at the club nightly and sometimes had sex with the dancers.

Posner and his 57-year-old wife also are charged with falsifying business records. Prosecutors say Betty Posner helped hide cash generated by the club.

I guess you’d hope that a lawyer would understand the tremendous illegalities he’s undertaking with this venture, but when you’re a wealthy lawyer, why not set up a club that will make you a crapload of money and provide you with some scandalous stripper hole on the side? I dare say that’s the American dream…at least as presented to me through The Sopranos.

On the plus side, it’s nice to know that places like this still exist. Uh, not to frequent them. Too expensive. I mean, classless. Yes. Classless.