The woman pictured below was fired from her job as a waitress due to rules saying all female employees should wear make-up. Is it fair? Probably not, in theory. But you look at the picture below and you judge.

Shenoa Vild hates to wear makeup. Face ]]>

The woman pictured below was fired from her job as a waitress due to rules saying all female employees should wear make-up. Is it fair? Probably not, in theory. But you look at the picture below and you judge.

Shenoa Vild hates to wear makeup. Face goop is simply not for her. She happens to think she has a naturally healthy, vibrant complexion. After meeting her, I have to agree.

But Vild, a waitress, says her former boss had an entirely different opinion.

He wanted Vild to wear makeup.

She wouldn’t.

So, she says, she got canned.

Mark Oliver, the new owner, said he couldn’t go into details as to what happened with Vild. Oliver did say she was the only employee who was unable to deal with the transition.

“Shenoa could still be here if she wanted,” said Oliver, who used to be a part owner of George’s at the Cove in La Jolla. “I had no problem with anybody else. If she would have made the same accommodations that the new ownership was asking, she’d still be here.”

“I always thought I looked silly wearing makeup,” Vild, a 27-year-old North Park resident, told me. “And I don’t think I need it.”

Now I’m pretty much the biggest feminist you’ve ever met, as evidenced by how often I wear my Female Body Inspector t-shirts (I wear them and grope you because I care), but I really can’t take her side. She looks like Fred Armisen in a blonde wig. Not only should she have been forced to wear make-up, she should have been held down until they could permanently tattoo the make-up to her face. It’s not a restaurant’s fault that they want to be known as a place with hot chicks, just like it’s not my fault for accidentally making them spill a smoothie on my lap so that they have to delicately dab my crotch off while I moan in ecstasy. We all make sacrifices when we’re in a restaurant, toots.

[via]

Alternate title: This bitch really needs some dick. A bit blunt? Perhaps…but aspiring to take out a personal ad at the Super Bowl (valued at $3 million) warrants such pleasant attention.

A Manhattan lonely heart wants to buy a $3 million Super Bowl ad so she ]]>

Alternate title: This bitch really needs some dick. A bit blunt? Perhaps…but aspiring to take out a personal ad at the Super Bowl (valued at $3 million) warrants such pleasant attention.

A Manhattan lonely heart wants to buy a $3 million Super Bowl ad so she can advertise her availability to millions of potential husbands nationwide.

Amy Borkowsky – who gives her age as somewhere between Carrie and Samantha – is confident she’ll up her odds of marriage if she markets herself to an audience of captive, guacamole-gutted football fans.

“Dating is a numbers game,” she said. “I need to reach a large pool of guys.”

To that end, she has created a Web site, SuperBowlSingleGirl.com, to raise money to reach her multimillion-dollar goal to buy a 30-second shot at love.

So far, she has bagged about a grand, mostly from $10 and $25 donations.

Borkowsky has already brainstormed ideas for a TV spot. She might write a jingle, feature testimonials from ex-lovers or even do side-by-side comparisons of her and other single gals.

It’s a complete and utter publicity stunt (going through her site yields incessant mentions of her undoubtedly funny stand-up and the names of her comedy CDs. Yes I’m sure you’d find a lot of jokes about how tough it is to be a single gal, how men don’t appreciate a good lady, how you too can smash your face against a toaster and still work your way into the public eye, etc.) But let’s say, for her sake, that she’s legitimately hoping this works and wants to succeed and not just doing it to desperately cling for attention. Maybe she could ask for $3.3 million to get a little work done before making the ad. Or maybe she can just really fix herself and invest all that money into making her look slightly less like Baraka from Mortal Kombat.

I would rather let an Italian monkey on a 1920s street corner insert my penis into one of those grinder jukeboxes than I would give it into her. I’d also probably rather date the monkey. At least he wouldn’t always be talking about how hard it is to find a good Jewish man and he’d probably be throwing slightly less feces at me.

[source]

Please Lisa Rinna, please, do us all a favor and quit the Botox Injections. In fact, on your birthday today, your one wish should be that you start to look like a human being again.

What is it about chicks named Lisa? Why they always gotta be raunchy, gross, or ]]>

Please Lisa Rinna, please, do us all a favor and quit the Botox Injections. In fact, on your birthday today, your one wish should be that you start to look like a human being again.

What is it about chicks named Lisa? Why they always gotta be raunchy, gross, or ugly cartoon characters.

Don’t believe me, let’s take a look.

Lisa Rinna

I assure you that she used to look normal. In fact, some might even call her hot. But now, that’s way in the past

Lisa Lampanelli

No words of mine can describe why any person, let alone a NFL player, would hit this.

Lisa Bonet

When she was Denise, I’ll admit, she was ok. But the years have not been kind. Supposedly, the last shower Bonet ever took was on the set of A Different World.

Lisa Simpson

When the only dude that wants you is Milhouse, you need to re-establsish your place in life. I’m guessing a new hairdo might do her some good

Mona Lisa

Are we still convinced this is a woman? Because if it is, she’s nasty. I don’t know why the painting is famous. If you want, I can go to the park right now and take pictures of chicks who are just as ugly. Maybe it’ll sell for a couple of bucks on a fetish website or something.