7 year-old drives car, is child

Some kid who totally wasn’t any sort of ethnicity drove his grandmother’s car down MARTIN LUTHER KING BLVD (DING DING) and crashed it. It’s a slow news day, blow me.

Matthew Sands had to look twice at the driver of a red Geo Tracker that passed him on Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard Tuesday morning.

Mafatau told police he tried to stop the vehicle as the 7-year-old boy crashed into a bush near Burger King west of the mall. The boy drove off around the mall and then crashed into a bush and tree near Outback Steakhouse when Sands stopped his car and tried to get the keys out of the Geo.

The boy then threw the vehicle in reverse and backed into Sands’ car in the mall drive off Granville Avenue.

“He was awful small to be driving,” said Sands of Hartford City.

You know who else is awful small to be driving? Midgets. And we not only let them drive their stupid midget cards with sticks and booster seats everywhere, but we also let them LIVE. And REPRODUCE! So f that, let this little kid drive all he wants. At least he’s going to grow some day.

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