Boy Scouts get smited…smote? Is it smote?

Whatever the past participle may be of “smite” may be, some Boy Scouts in Iowa got fed up by a tornado. Tornados: 1, Homoerotic children’s clubs: 0, Ties: 1.

Frightened Boy Scouts huddled in a shelter as a tornado tore through their western Iowa campground, killing four people and injuring 48 others who had little to no warning of the approaching twister.

Tornadoes also touched down in Kansas, Minnesota and Nebraska on Wednesday. They killed at least two people in northern Kansas, destroyed much of the small town of Chapman and caused extensive damage on the Kansas State University campus.

In Iowa, rescue workers cut their way through downed branches and dug through debris amid rain and lightning Wednesday night to reach the camp where the 93 boys, ages 13 to 18, and 25 staff members were attending a weeklong leadership training camp.

The boys were split into two groups when the storm hit the Little Sioux Scout Ranch in the remote Loess Hills. One group managed to take shelter, while the other was out hiking.

Hmm, it would appear as though they misspelled “f’ing” in that last paragraph. Can’t FOX afford a good copy editor? Jeez.

The death/injury toll seems to be a little too even though for my tastes. Almost like they were paired off. And stuck together. As if each Boy Scout had a partner, sometimes another Boy Scout, sometimes a Troop Leader. Perhaps they were entangled in some way, one caught inside the other like a hairless Chinese finger trap.

I remember when my dad took me to an introductory Boy Scout meeting when I was little. I was like, seven years old maybe, and I just remember thinking “Holy crap this is so gay.” And that was before the ceremonial “dry finger in the asshole” introduction. At least if it’s slippery, you can say it slid in (ask my girlfriend). But apparently you don’t understand discretion when you’re one with nature.

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