Cocaine cheaper than beer, world makes no sense

A new study in the UK has determined that, in proportion, cocaine is cheaper than beer. That makes it more fiscally responsible to spend all night thinking up crazy ideas than it is to sit around with a couple Buds and watch the game.

The Home Office has admitted that the street price of both cocaine and heroin has fallen by nearly half in the last ten years, making the most dangerous illegal drugs cheaper than they have ever been.

Based on reports from police forces, the Home Office said that cocaine is now being sold for as little as £20 a gram in some parts of the country.

The most common price for the drug is £40 per gram. Home Office figures for 1998 show the average price was £77.

A gram of heroin can now be bought for as little as £25, with the average price somewhere between £40 and £50 per gram. In 1998, the average was £74.

The Home Office figures are based on data collected from police forces and the Serious Organised Crime Agency.

According to DrugScope, a charity that provides research and advice on drugs policy, gram of cocaine can make between 10 and 20 lines for snorting, depending on its strength.

That means a line of cocaine can cost as little as £1, with an average price per line of between £2 and £4.

The average price of a pint of lager is around £2.75, although some pub chains have reacted to the credit crunch by cutting the price of a pint as low as 99p. A glass of wine typically costs £3.50.

I can’t see how this is possibly a good reflection on the economy, but, more pressingly, I tend to think that this is a reflection of how most of our global problems with drugs are kind of ridiculous. In America, you get arrested for possessing a gram of pot but if you drunk drive into a church filled with infants, you’re given a medal of valor. It’s true. It happened in Alabama I think. Even in other “more sophisticated” countries where they give their kids drinks with dinner, they hardly ever get their kid doing drops of acid or crystal meth. I guess the point is that we need more stoned children out there! Drugs for all! Sobriety for none! If stoners weren’t so lazy and watching episodes of Scooby Doo wondering how they got to make a sandwich so big, this would have happened back like 30 years ago. Stupid lazy stoners and your drugs.

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