How to turn an enemy into a friend

Via Basic Instructions comes this comic about the multitude of ways you can turn an enemy into one of your closest pals.

I don’t think I could ever be friends with someone who was like WAYYYY into strip clubs. Don’t get me wrong, once in a while, they’re perfectly acceptable for seeing breasts while paying entirely too much for a rum and coke and simultaneously funding several drug habits masquerading as a need of money for college. But the guys whose response to, “Hey, where she would we go” always ends in an establishment with nude women dancing about shouldn’t be trusted. It’s not that I think there’s something wrong with someone who completely views women as objects, because I certainly don’t, but rather because there are much more affordable ways of seeing women in various stages of undress. Have you never worked in a hospital? One day as a volunteer there and you’ll have unfettered access to all sorts of barely conscious women. You haven’t lived until you’ve lovingly slipped the gown off of someone in a coma. It’s about as sexy as molesting a vegetable could be, other than putting lipstick on a cucumber and shoving it in the nearest unclean orifice.

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