James Franco deserves to speak at UCLA

I don’t know if James Franco was actually supposed to speak at UCLA, but let’s pretend he was. Here’s a humorous video of his submitted commencement speech.

There’s always a certain irony to me when schools have these people who pretty much didn’t do things how you’re “supposed to” yet became immensely successful speaking to a bunch of student who just paid like $160,000 to do this college thing and, quite possible, end up failing. I went to a friend’s graduation and the former CEO of Vitamin Water was there to receive some honorary medal or some crap. He went to this (not-so-prestigious) college for 2 years to get an Associate’s degree in Sports Administration with hopes of becoming the basketball coach at the school and President of the United States. Yes, an adult male who doesn’t have Down’s had these dreams. Yet he somehow ended up creating Vitamin Water and making billions when it sold to Coca Cola. The school also referred to Vitamin Water as “the leading beverage in the enhanced water category.” This was an ACTUAL SPEECH at a COLLEGE GRADUATION that kids paid tens of thousands to receive. What a masterful way to make someone regret a life of debt in one swoop. In your face, believers in higher learning!

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