Phase 1: Steal bull semen. Phase 2: ?. Phase 3: PROFIT

In Scotland, some thieves stole a fload of bull semen, probably more for sale than for a tasting session. One can only hope.

The incident happened near Brydekirk in Dumfries and Galloway some time between Sunday and Thursday.

The semen is stored in a purpose-built flask containing liquid nitrogen in order to keep it at a fixed temperature.

A police spokesman said the flask was the only item taken during the raid on the farm.

“Due to the high value it will have a market – somebody will take it off their hands.”

Tee hee take it off their hands. Man, how low must you be on ideas for crime when you get to the point where you’re stealing bull semen for profit? I get it’s Scotland and all and they’re all fed up and like to stick all sorts of things in sheep orifices, but nonetheless this seems like it’d be at least bottom ten on the ideas of crimes to make money. Probably right ahead of jerking off homeless men for their change or sawing off people’s legs and then selling them to hungry Vikings.

[source]

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