Presence of midgets, topless women shut down bar's liquor license

You know how you know you’re a great bar owner? You have midgets and topless oil wrestling at your establishment.

The liquor license for a Canton business will be suspended for 60 days because two women wrestled topless at a recent “midget wrestling event.”

The penalty is substantial, Mayor Kevin Meade said after the city liquor commission voted unanimously Wednesday to suspend the license for Outskirts Bar and Grill at 725 W. Locust St.

“It’s meant to send a message to other businesses in town that this won’t be tolerated,” Meade said.

Outskirts owner Kim Scott cried after the vote.

“I’m not being treated like any other business,” she said. “Don’t tell me I am, because I’m not.”

Outskirts hosted a Micro Wrestling Federation event on Aug. 16.

Scott said she had a contract with the group for male wrestlers to perform. When the group arrived, Scott said, two women in oil were wrestling topless while she was outside smoking.

Scott said she stopped the match as soon as she found out the women were topless.

You know who I feel bad for? The midgets. They’re trying to run a legitimate business in the form of their wrestling federation and they have to get lumped in with such classless individuals as the topless girls. Don’t these people understand that the diminutive performers are serious athletes? And what about the little wrestler with the preacher gimmick? Father McLittle must have been outraged at the blatant slap to the face of his religion.

Topless women. How awful. I’d much rather have a bunch of drunken depressed men, 50 year-old bar skanks, and stale beer served in poorly-cleaned glasses. Thanks Canton!

--- Did you like this article? And you probably like contests, exclusive content, and smug commentary right? Then why aren't you liking Guyism on Facebook? Show some pride and click the "Like" button below right now: