Top 10 reasons why this MLB season sucks

by DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool.com

hi,+i%27m+here+to+piss+on+your+back+and+tell+you+it%27s+rain Top 10 reasons why this MLB season sucks10) My Oakland A’s aren’t just awful, they are unwatchable and awful (hey, Billy Beane, why don’t you use your mighty brain to actually draft an MLB-level hitter?)

9) Roto fantasy leagues have already decided their champion through the answer to one question — “Who Owns Zach Greinke?”

8) The MLB+ teams in the AL East have re-established their dominance, allowing the World Wide Lemur to fulfill its preferred fluffer role as YES2/NESN2

7) Non MLB+ teams now not only lose their best players as soon as they become free agents; they also juke the season by not starting the year with them

6) Bud Selig remains commissioner for the low low price of $16 million a year, rather than his proper market driven rate of torches and pitchforks

5) The Dodgers clinched the NL West before the end of April

4) Now that New York has new stadiums, everyone has finally realized that new stadiums are simply More Money for Less Game, and about as necessary and useful as an all-day enema

3) Despite the Phillies breaking through and becoming World Series Champions, Philly Fans are still angry little puppies

2) The Rookie of the Year will be won by players who don’t have a full year up, and if it’s a pitcher, you will have to not blink to see him, since pitchers are now treated like hothouse flowers in terms of innings and pitch counts

1) All of my fantasy teams suck, suck, suck



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Douglas Charles Douglas Charles, aka "DC Scrap," is the managing editor of Guyism.com. His experience includes operating an assortment sports and entertainment Web sites over the past decade, but his specialty is discovering sexy women from all over the world that he knows he will never have a chance with, let alone meet - a quality he shares with 99.99% of his readers.

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