Uhhhhh this is pretty terrible sex bait

You would think that to lure people into an alley for sex so that you could shoot them, you’d need some sexy bait. Well, look at the two chicks used as bait. Sooo maybe I’ve been giving criminals too much credit.

Two men were shot in an alley early Wednesday morning after they were lured there by women who offered sex acts in exchange for money, police said.

Officers said it was a trap laid by two women and two male accomplices. They had been cruising the Plaza and Westport areas, looking for victims, Officer Darin Snapp said.

“This was all planned out. Two women and two men conspired before they even got to Westport, and that’s what they were going to do,” Snapp told KMBC’s Jim Flink.

Dawn Clark, 38, and Krystal Myers, 20, are accused of offering a good time to two unsuspecting patrons, but what they were really going to do was rob them, police said.

“According to these two victims, they had no idea. They just thought they’d met two girls who were going to go home, do some more partying and have a good time,” Snapp said.

Now far be it from me to mock victims (see advertisers, I’m not such a bad guy! SEE!) but if this is your idea of a couple of good time girls, you probably deserve to get shot (oh, nevermind. Skip this post advertisers). Ideally, you’d get shot in the groin because, hey, let’s face it, there really wasn’t going to be a whole lot of social upward mobility for future generations, now was there?

You have to commend the girls for everything up until the getting arrested part though. They were basically being pimped out for money without having to have sex. That’s a pretty sweet deal and truly a testament to the power of feminine cunning. Honestly I’ll lead you into a dark alley right now for $20 so long as I don’t have to give you a tug or do the actual shooting. That’s just savvy business. And also probably why I’m not a CEO.

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