Woman has big mouth, swallows jars, scares me

Posted by Chris Spags on March 2nd, 2009 at 11:22 am

Our friends at Buzzfeed unearthed an AWFUL TERRIBLE AWFUL video of a Japanese show (stunner) featuring a woman with a monstrous mouth. Literally, like a monster. Take a look.

It’s pretty obvious to make a joke like “I bet she can suck a dick lol” but f that. That would be awful. It may shock you to learn that my penis is not roughly the size of a grenade launcher so I’m pretty sure it’d be in this chick’s mouth lost and afraid, like a little kid in the woods in a cautionary fairy tale. And my penis doesn’t have a lunchbox full of breadcrumbs to find its way back out, so that’s a pretty horrific outcome to subject my genitals to. And I’d get about as much pleasure out of it as I would getting a root canal performed on my ass. So I guess the point is that you need to use dick jokes responsibly because your penis can’t look out for itself.

*the more you knowwwww

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Chris Spags "Internet Heartthrob" Chris Spags is a former comic and the founding editor of Guyism.com. In addition to overseeing all Guyism content and business development, he covers Humor for the site daily. He was recognized on the street once and it was awesome.