Why is this baby chilling in the middle of the road?

Posted by Shawn Norris on May 27th, 2010 at 10:45 am

Come on, baby. Everybody knows that if you’re going to stand in the middle of the road and do nothing, you need to have an orange reflector vest and position with the Department of Transportation.

How are babies supposed to travel around at night? They’re way to small to reach the pedals on most American made automobiles. And cabs…come on, alone in the middle of the night with a stranger in a car? Way too dangerous for a baby. Babies need bus passes and a way to flag down buses so that they don’t pass their stop. This is apparently how they do that in San Antonio.

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Shawn Norris Shawn Norris used to write things for National Lampoon and the now-defunct Blue Monkey Disco Party as "Douche Larue." Now he spends most of his time writing jokes, scripts, and trying to find a literary agent that will return his calls. Even though he wasn’t born yet, he often takes credit for faking the moon landing. Also, he’s allergic to tequila -- it makes him breakout in felonies.